“Who Has a Date With Elvira? (Poll Included)”

• Elvira and I had our date earlier this month so I am good! 9 votes
  53%
• No sign of her yet and I'm starting to worry she won't show and I will miss out for months - if not indefinitely! 3 votes
  18%
• Elvira's personal assistant (aka my distro) called me to say she won't be able to make it and a raincheck will probably take me to late in the year. 0 votes
• I dated Elvira months ago but we eventually called it off. She was always lighting candles in my apartment and the risk of fire stressed me out. 1 vote
  6%
• I canceled my date with Elvira because of rumors that lately she's been arriving with all these issues and needs far too much attention. 0 votes
• I was never interested in Elvira because I don't like cuddling with women who wear unsheathed daggers on their hips. 4 votes
  24%