I have looked at this post a few times and still words escape me and none can or could do justice to what you are going through. So sorry for your losses.
The only consolation is and its a big one [and the most important one] is you and everyone else is ok.
Can't take it with you as they say. Best wishes man. Sigh.
Best of the new year to you. Hang in there. Its always darkest before the dawn.