Hopkins, MN
You marry a woman five times your size so you have someone to help move pinball machines.
LTG : )
(Topic ID: 272389)
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Quoted from Gunnut40:If your drunk at 4 in the morning and wondering if you might get banned from pinside. Was that a run sentence ahhh hell nah I done pissed um for sure!
Lol. Been there. Done that. Especially back in the good ole days!
Most pinballers have some redneck in em. 
. And that's a good thing.
Odiner is a Cali version redneck. 
Maybe off topic, maybe not.
If you have had a few beers and ready to crash for the night, and a old Travis Tritt song just went through your head "a great day to be alive" with all this crazy mess going on...
If at this moment, you still have hopes and dreams, you will be fine in the long run, Because:
you will be able to somehow keep working toward your goal, no matter what your goal may be, and you will be fine with a tad of redneck in you.
1 week later
You are a Redneck if you;
Repair your own cars if you learned to or if you want to learn to
Know how to can food, own a hot bath canner and a supply of jars. Yankees use pressure cookers.
Have actually sewn something (Button, hole in jeans, patch) in the past 30 days
Brag about your Antique (vintage?) kerosene lamp restorations.
Can put in a Top and quilt it (though you would rather leave it to the Ladies)
Know what "Fat, or Lightener Wood" is used for and where it comes from.
Can clean a fish or other fresh Seafood and prepare it well. Catching such is a given.
Have washed exceptionally dirty clothes in a tub, sink, drum, or washpot over a fire with Borax.
Like to keep matches around, especially wooden stick, even though lighters are easier.
Prefer tapers to jar candles. Have and actually use holders for tapers.
More to come, tune in here for Real Redneck Experience. Or not.
Quoted from electricsquirrel:Redneck?
I thought most normal guys know how to do most of that stuff.
There you go..
Killed and cleaned squirrels after the first frost? Barbecued the heads and picked steamed brains out after cracking the skull with a spoon?
Enjoyed pork brains and scrambled eggs on a regular basis? Salt mullet and eggs for breakfast?
Know the difference between cabbage collards and Georgia collards and cook them with cornbread dumplings, cracklings or fatback?
Actually ate Tripe with biscuits for breakfast? Know what tomato gravy is and how to make it?
Actively seek out pickled pork Tenderloin? Homemade sour kraut from 20plus year starter?
Yeah, you are a member.
You might be a redneck if you always start a story with the words, "Y'all ain't gonna believe this."
Quoted from Gunnut40:If your lawn mower is worth more than your car! You just might be a redneck. I ain’t kidding neither.
My mower is probably worth more than my 1988 F-150.
Quoted from JohnnyPinball007:My mower is probably worth more than my 1988 F-150.
Damn right it is! Any redneck knows that lawn mower is more important than truck! Damn chiggers will eat you alive. Don’t ask anybody up north about that.
Quoted from Gunnut40:Damn right it is! Any redneck knows that lawn mower is more important than truck!
The truck is pretty damn important. I use it to move logs around to cut for firewood.
Like the David Allen Coe song "if that ain't country", the song says "I spent my summer times busting up logs for the winter".
Hell, while ago I mowed about 2 acres, and split 2/3 of a cord of wood.
Now I have not dipped Skoal, or chewed Red-Man in a long while, but I wish I still could. (that stuff just got to where it gave me too much heartburn).
And hell, with virus stuff I never go anywhere anymore, so I stopped shaving, and I have a white beard now. (my girlfriend is not happy about that but she is out of town at the moment).
O-din started some awesome topics, I think his best is the bitch thread. And while he is on vacation I will try to keep his stuff going on.
And 100% true, I have a 1988 F-150 and a mower worth more than it. And I did cut a lot of grass and split a lot of firewood while ago.
And sometimes I still like to listen to some old country music like Oak Ridge Boys, Alabama, Ronnie Milsap.
But the other 80% of the time I am normal and wear a Hawaiian shirt and listen to new rock.
(and the members here that have bought games from me will tell you I wear some pretty good shirts).
Sorry for the long rant. I hope it was entertaining. I needed it to unwind.
Damn dude your posts are long! I’m cool with that as long I can you jabber jaws. David Allen cole that’s not pc. I have black friend who listen to his music. He doesn’t judge. Keep on posting like you do. Don’t be sorry for shit!
Melbourne
Quoted from Gunnut40:Damn right it is! Any redneck knows that lawn mower is more important than truck!
I would have thought a pick up truck would come first , even before the wife and kids , maybe not the dog . 
Screenshot_2020-08-23-19-20-13-28 (resized).pngIf the woman you call your date breast fed you when you were a baby.....you just might be a redneck.
Quoted from PinNickleby:If the woman you call your date breast fed you when you were a baby.....you just might be a redneck.
I gave you a thumbs up anyway, but I think you are confused a tad, in that situation it is normally a hillbilly.
You might be a Redneck if when people talk about the "Big Easy", you think they are referring to your ex-girlfriend.
Quoted from JohnnyPinball007:I gave you a thumbs up anyway, but I think you are confused a tad, in that situation it is normally a hillbilly.
And I am just joking, that is what you do in the lounges, you try to have fun and make people laugh.
2 weeks later
2 weeks later
Quoted from JohnnyPinball007:You might be a Redneck if
A tree falls through your roof and you decide to leave it there.
Quoted from JohnnyPinball007:You might be a Redneck if
You had your wedding pictures at the mall!
Surrey, BC
Quoted from Coindork:I like this one quite a bit.
Better hope you don’t get a grease fire on that grill. [quoted image]
That’s the greatest thing I have ever seen
Quoted from cmack750:Or, if you just go to the titty bar......because they have the best buffet in town.
This actually reminds me of a great story.....
About 15 years ago, I went back to Utah to visit family for the holidays. At some point, my younger brother (who I hadn't seen for 6-7 years) dragged me out of the house to go hang out....and took me to a strip club. A real winner one to boot.....the kind of place strippers go to die.
But.....there was one girl that my brother was infatuated with.....big spender was raining $1 bills non-stop. Then he leaned over to me and said "Remember her?". I did not. "She used to babysit me when I was a kid", he said.
Stay classy, bro.
Quoted from JodyG:[quoted image]
Sorry to quote such an old post but I just noticed it, HOLY CRAP! Small world, that Trader Joe's is walking distance from my work, I see the Frankenvette in traffic from time to time.
It's quite the sight to behold, I tried to snap a picture last time I saw it but the light turned green before I could.
(resized).png
Quoted from FlipperMagician:Sorry to quote such an old post but I just noticed it, HOLY CRAP! Small world, that Trader Joe's is walking distance from my work, I see the Frankenvette in traffic from time to time.
It's quite the sight to behold, I tried to snap a picture last time I saw it but the light turned green before I could.
[quoted image]
BMW did it better...
1 week later
Quoted from LTG:You marry a woman five times your size so you have someone to help move pinball machines.
LTG : )
Just because I am polite and from the South, I would never ask a young lady to help me carry anything, even if she is strong, especially a pinball machine....
And all women prefer to be addressed as a "young lady", no matter what their age is.
If she wants to hold the door open, that is her decision.
Real men carry stuff for ladies, cause they want to keep them happy.
Women have other things to take care of that men are not allowed to do too.
Men also open doors for them and always say "please", "thank you", "Yes mam" and "no mam".
If that makes me a redneck, so be it...
Quoted from mcluvin:BMW did it better...
[quoted image]
What a great reply. LMAO 
Quoted from Dent00:If that makes me a redneck, so be it...
I think you may be guilty of cultural appropriation, because (at least from that post) nobody I know is gonna call you a redneck.
Quoted from skink91:I think you may be guilty of cultural appropriation, because (at least from that post) nobody I know is gonna call you a redneck.
I would not be so sure about that. I worked in New Jersey for about a year and everybody there called me a hillbilly. I told them I was not from Tennessee, but they could not tell the difference in my accent from people in those areas. So, I told them that I was a redneck.
Quoted from Dent00:I would not be so sure about that. I worked in New Jersey for about a year and everybody there called me a hillbilly.
That very well could be... its just not for those reasons you listed in your previous post. But what do I know at the end of the day. People in the city tend to have some odd superiority thing regarding non-city folk that makes them weak and foolish. I have lived in larger metro areas since high school but grew up out in the country... if there is one thing I do know though - city folk don’t actually know what ‘redneck’ is.
1 week later
Quoted from eagle18:If u weld a pipe wrench to the nut on the bottom of your trailer hitch ball and use it as a step.
Ok I actually have never seen something like this before so I had to look - yes you can buy this as a commercial product $33
https://www.amazon.com/Reese-Towpower-7060200-Hitch-Step/dp/B00ECW2T38/ref=sr_1_2
I use a tailgate ladder myself, not redneck, just old ...
https://www.amazon.com/Beech-Lane-Pickup-Tailgate-Ladder/dp/B078YFVS8V/ref=sr_1_1
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