Quoted from pezpunk:the reason it's easy for you to be like "eh, everyone should lighten up, like me!" is because to you it's academic -- pinball in general has been built by and for people like you, and is overwhelmingly populated by people like you. whereas to others who feel like a small minority, this place can seem viscerally unwelcoming, especially if you peek in and immediately see a bunch of dudes appearing to mock and demean people of your type.
being asked not to demean another type of person ("censorship") is NOT the same experience as being demeaned yourself, and i wish dudes would stop equating the two.
"if you don't like it, ignore it" is an overtly unwelcoming attitude, and is the kind of approach that results in a community that self-selects itself into being overwhelmingly white and male. there are, of course, women, LGBTQ folks, and people of color who are cool with the current Pinside culture, but their existence does not invalidate the experience of those who do feel like this place could stand to make more of an effort to be a comfortable hangout for all types.
take Kayluh's post above, for example. obviously not a post designed to get a positive response, but a perfect example of someone who has clearly been alienated and frustrated by a community that has shown little interest in making her feel welcome.
Of course everyone should feel welcome, but they don't have to participate in every single topic. I'm totally against gay bashing and racist comments, but where do we draw the line? You've got prudish radfems, trans exclusionary radfems, regular feminists, sex-positive feminists, free-the-nipple movements... It's all over the place with disagreements. I don't care if a guy watches pornography or frequents strip clubs, I don't care if you're a saint and have a sex-negative attitude.
While this thread was humorous in nature, it was based on the slight truth that guys into pinball seem to have more steady relationships than strictly video gamers from the pinball guys that I know. Every other direction this thread went I suppose was just a natural progression.
It's not nice to think that you hurt someone's feelings, especially on purpose, but you can't please all people all of the time.
So yes, I hope this place becomes more progressive towards minorities, but no I don't think that objectification is wrong in all cases.
Someone will objectfy, say, a sexy model in a pin-up calendar. Please keep in mind that it was the personal choice of said model to pose for that line of work and I respect their choice. The attention gained was the intended perpose of the calendar. Liking women/men sexually does not equal hating women/men, it's the opposite I believe.
I've said it before, but hopefully most guys can tell the difference between an actor/actress/model/advertising from reality and the way *people* in general should be treated.
A lot of women spend a huge chunk of everyday life trying to look their best physically. Obviously they/we want to feel better about themselves and possibly garnish positive attention & maybe get paid a few compliments. It's also common sense to not give someone unwanted attention. A thread, like any other conversation is fluid and will be filled with many different opinions.
Are my opinions right? Of course they're not right, it's just an opinion afterall & we're all unique individuals. As individuals, can we not choose which threads or conversations that we wish to be part of?
Everyone should be themselves, but there will always be unpopular opinions and hopefully we can continue to have both humor threads and serious threads.... And the wisdom to know the difference.
Odon, IN
Toronto, ON
What, is it easier to protect your family with a butter knife? Now a guy can't even protect his family without offending the snow flakes. The bar just keeps getting set so, so low.
Sydney
