Here you go iceman44
“ Tough post.
Slap Save has... come to an end. I (this is Jason) wanted to try to explain my motivations with ending the podcast, stepping away from TPN, and my feelings I have experienced over the past month or more. It was my intention to quietly walk away, but it seems that my silence is only fueling speculation and causing people to wonder and cause more issues, so I will address that here. Matt is free to disclose his thoughts, but these words are my own.
I grew tired of the drama, the trolls, the spite and insecurity of some. My “investment” in the hobby was no longer providing a return. Not financially, but emotionally. That’s it.
I am friends with, and respect Zach, Ken, Dennis, and the laundry list of all of the people involved with pinball who sincerely want to celebrate the hobby, entertain and inform while doing it. Everyone at TPN is doing just that. I left TPN, not because those friendships are dissolved, but the opposite. They are as strong as ever, and I want them to stay that way. My repressed, volatile temper of the past, and history of staying calm till I snap, and snap big, created a situation where I could have jeopardized everything with one tirade that bared all the truth and bottled up frustrations of the past few months on some very cowardly, manipulative targets. My “eye started twitching,” and I knew, it was time. For my own health, sanity and the benefit of some of my best friends, I have stepped away from the hobby.
I am a big believer in Karma. You reap what you sow. There have been some seeds planted by some despicable mother&$@#^$# in this hobby that I can’t not wait to germinate and see the fruits of their “labor”. I will quietly be smiling and cheering from the side when that happens.
If a show isn’t your style, find another. If you want to just stand on some shitty card table chair on pinside and scream how you don’t listen to podcasts, and we are just after attention, that's your prerogative. The irony is not lost on most of us though that when you stand on that chair, on that forum, screaming, it is just a low rent version of the same thing. You are broadcasting an opinion, but your time spent around too much coil dust prevents your 10 IQ threshold from recognizing that. That is called hypocrisy. You are called a fu#^&ing dipshit. I used to punch drywall and smug faces. Now I just dispense literary justice. My therapist would be proud.
Has it been easy backing off? Hell no. I really consider this little endeavor we started to be a family. If you are reading this, chances are you are part of that family. I enjoy the side conversations I have with all of you who take the time to reach out, and just knowing we created something that some of you claimed to enjoy, made all the headaches, anxiety, stress and time...so worth it. I have sold most of my collection. It is my way of simplifying and removing myself from a hobby that has left a bad taste in my mouth recently. I hope by getting back to just playing pinball, removing the white noise, and enjoying the people who are good like yourselves, that spark will return.
I want to thank Zach Meny and Ken Cromwel and Jeff Patterson for their early support and encouragement when I had no idea how to even run a podcast. Chris Hoeper, a friend (again, thankfully) who I owe for not only the name, but the desire to keep things fun and for going through the early headaches, re-records and friction. Matt Koenen who, is not only one of my best friends, but has put up with my idiosyncrasies and always told me when an idea was bad, and made me laugh while doing it. Dennis Kriesel, a friend I consider to be a savant when it comes to his knowledge of pinball with an incredible ability to communicate it through both pen and podcast. Christopher Franchi, a guy I am proud to call a friend, my favorite artist and someone who has supported me from early on. Dwight Sullivan, who personifies pinball and showed it with all his support and help. All the industry people who agreed to interviews and gave our show credibility beyond what it ever deserved. ALL the long time friends and supporters of the show Sammy, Joe Fox, Marc, Duke, Rawdon, Krystle, Marlon, Chris “the pintern”, Mike, Jay, Joe, David, Brian, Brad… the list could go on forever. Most of all, I want to thank all of you who took the time to listen. Our listener numbers continued to shock me every week and it will always be something I am very proud of. Without each and every one of you, we would have been rambling on about this ridiculous subject to a digital version of an empty theater. I am a little emotional as I write this, and that is just knowing that I am closing the book of a story that I really enjoyed, even if the end was a little disappointing. I would still read it again… or at least grab the audio tape.
Be kind to one another. Play pinball and make friends, not enemies, doing it. Life’s too short. Is it worth destroying your perceived “competitors” to reside on the top of this tiny little hill that some of us have convinced ourselves is a mountain? Not for me. I’d rather go play pinball.”