This year, I received the best gift of all - I discovered the true meaning of Christmas. Allow me to explain...
At first, I was a bit frustrated about all of the commercialism surrounding the holiday. It appeared the holidays turned into nothing more than a quick cash grab. For example, my dog entered a Christmas decorating context and won a sizable cash prize. (beagles are known for their decorating skills, btw) Then my younger sister wrote a letter to Santa only asking for cash! (tens & twenties mostly) Good grief... Then, an on-and-off again friend of mine thought it a good idea for me to direct the school Christmas play - she thought that I may change my mind regarding the holidays if I had more community involvement. She dabbles in psychiatry, so I agreed. Well, it ended up that my classmates first made fun of me, mocked me and/or flat-out ignored me!
I figured that maybe I could get their attention if I made the stage more festive, so I went out in search of the perfect Christmas tree. I took a friend with me too, as he has an eye for these things, plus he carries an emergency blanket with him as it's so cold in our area of the country. After an exhaustive search, I found the perfect specimen! My friend thought differently at first, but I convinced him that this is also an area of my expertise and with just a few LED's and mods, this tree will really shine. Well, we brought the tree back to the auditorium and once again, I was met with ridicule and laughter. I had just about enough of this! Out of sheer frustration, I yelled out to everyone and asked if they knew what Christmas is all about? My blanket buddy quickly stood up for me and rose to my defense. Now, I don't fully remember everything he said as his dialect is quite different than what I'm used too, but either way, I'm certain that it was religious in nature and against commercialism in general. (I should note that my parents & teachers all have speech impediments, but I've grown accustomed to their distinct sounding voices)
I was still angry though, so I stormed out of the school with my tree and thought I would dress it up a bit. (I'd show them!) I ended up stopping off at my dogs house and borrowed an ornament to place on top of my tree. Well, it was just my luck that the ornament was solidly built and rather heavy, so upon placement, the top branch flopped over lifelessly. Yep, I killed it.
Now, this is where I learned the true meaning of Christmas...
After I abandoned my Christmas tree endeavor due to its untimely death, all of my classmates that previously bullied me ended up stealing all of the decorations off my dogs finely decorated doghouse in an effort to show what a bit of bling & magic can do to a formerly stunning Christmas tree. (obviously, they have no respect for personal property or canine artistry) I returned to the scene of the crime and stood in shock seeing that they brought my tree back to life! I mean, just a few decorations were added but it completely changed its appearance and even caused all of the dead needles to regrow & spring to life! Seriously, it was fuller & greener than when it was originally rooted in the ground! It truly was a Festivus miracle... I then turned to see the gang all singing loudly. They ended by wishing me a Merry Christmas, en masse. (I say 'gang' because following their ornament thefts, my dog had them summarily arrested & they were last seen all working in a chain gang along I-80, somewhere in Ohio)
I guess I wasn't the only person that learned the true meaning of Christmas this holiday! (and it sure was better than my Halloween experience where all my friends got candy and I only got a rock....)
