Self-explanatory topic directed to inspired (and perhaps a little bored) brides and grooms. Here's my vows:
Wedding Vows for Pinsiders
I, ZNET, give to you, my betrothed, this ring,
as a symbol of my commitment
to love, honor, and respect you.
***
As this ring has no end, like the Jpop Zidware Pinside thread,
neither shall my love for you.
***
I place this ring upon your hand
as a sign of my love and fidelity
and, when I bring yet another game into the house,
as a reminder that you’re wearing the equivalent of Big Bang Bar on your 4th finger.
***
Your love is my anchor,
Your trust is my strength,
I will give you all my love
from now until eternity ends,
Just don’t ask me for a preorder deposit to Skit-B .
***
I will share my joy with you,
that it be multiplied,
like any good multiplier function on a solid state game.
I will share your pain,
that it be divided,
like the drain lanes of a pre-1965 EM, which lack return flipper lanes.
I will walk by your side
as we travel together through the modes of life,
completing the incomplete code of our future together.
***
With this ring, I give you my promise
that from this day forward
you shall not walk alone.
I have no greater gift to give than an Escalera hand truck.
May my heart be your shelter
and my arms be your home-use-only home.
May you always see the innocence in my eyes, and know that our union is in harmony,
even though macular degeneration is a consequence of overexposure to LEDs.
We will travel through life together in an imperturbable state of abiding dudeness.
