Some of you already received Stephanie's update. These are the only emails names I have at work so please forward to the rest of your families. Frank, you have the most to send to your siblings and mom.
I believe it was Saturday evening that Heather was feeling so ill that she went to the emergency room. Perhaps this was triggered in part by the chemotherapy, but the doctors had never seen such a reaction. She already had one treatment, but when I was there a week ago Thursday she didn't have a treatment because her blood makeup wasn't good enough. Last Thursday she had her second treatment. I believe it was Sunday evening when Rosanne called me to say she was driving Jeff to the hospital. She, Jeff, and Chris, Heather's mom, stayed for the duration. Chris has been a tower of strength and of great moral, emotional, and physical support throughout this whole time.
I got a call yesterday evening from Rosanne that Heather wasn't doing well and would probably never leave the hospital, but there still remained a slim hope. At about 2:30 am Rosanne called me to say that Heather's liver was failing (she had metasticized liver cancer from the breast cancer) and that she would not live more than 24 hours. At 8:35 am Rosanne called to say that Heather died at 8:30 (11:30 Georgia time ) and would I notify everyone. I had called my kids after each call from Rosanne. Joseph (dockman) and his girl friend Cherry were already planning to fly there Friday, hopefully to see Heather one last time. Dan and I are waiting to see about the funeral arrangements and plan to fly back there. Christina is in Yosemite, but already has tickets for mid-July.
The question: is it the cancer or the chemo that caused it? It is a moot point because the treatment was Heather's only chance. It may have shortened her life a little, but my guess is only by a week. Advanced liver cancer of this type seems to act quickly.
I may not have all of the facts and opinions exactly right, but I have tried my best. Financially the family will be ok because Heather had some life insurance. This cannot take the place of her presence. I feel like I have lost a daughter. Although I may not show it, the pain and anguish are real and profound. Pray for Heather and her family.
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Sent: Saturday, June 27, 2009 11:45:46 PM
Subject: Update
Hi Everyone,
We had a nice birthday for the kids. I've attached a pic that I took of the family. I made a scavenger hunt for the kids today where the end prize were bikes that Jeff bought. Very fun for them.
Heather had chemo on Thursday and usually feels bad Saturday and especially Sunday. They may adjust her dosage. Today was pretty bad for her. We keep trying to get her to eat stuff. She is constantly uncomfortable no matter where she's sitting. I feel terrible for her. She's such a trooper.
The kids just go about their business. I make references that their mom isn't feeling well and takes medicine that makes her tummy upset. So far they haven't had any further questions. Jeff's taking all the kids to church tomorrow except Nick and they're throwing a fit because it's sooooo boring.
Heather's going to call the doctor tomorrow or Monday so she can go in and get some fluids via IV. That usually makes her feel better so cross your fingers. It's been hard for her to sleep at night. I'm sitting up with her right now at 2:45am. She's lucky I'm a night owl.
It all really hits home when you're here watching it all. We get her anything she needs and carry everything for her. She moves from the downstairs chair to her bed upstairs and that's it. Standing is too tough right now.
The kids have been a little rambunctious, but mostly good. They fight a bit and Nick is in his distructo terrible twos. He's been talking a lot. I got him to say "I'm sorry Stephy" at least 4 times since that's how many times he's acted up and had to be put in time out. Super Nanny would be proud.
Hopefully I'll lose some weight from all the stair climbing I've been doing. I'm just glad Mom's here to share the work. Heather's mom is a saint for doing all of this all this time. Just keeping up with the daily cleaning is quite the chore.
Well, I guess that covers everything. Hopefully I can get more than 4 hours a night of sleep and hopefully my bug bites don't get infected. On the positive note, there are a lot of fireflies around. I've never seen them before so that's pretty cool.
Over and out,
Steph
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