(Topic ID: 314411)

Tell me I’m being stupid

By zr11990

68 days ago


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  • 47 posts
  • 33 Pinsiders participating
  • Latest reply 65 days ago by zr11990
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    26
    #1 68 days ago

    Today I am moving my son to Dallas to go to PT school. He got in on his first try I am crying like a bitch because my 22 year old should n is moving out. I will miss him so much

    22
    #2 68 days ago

    loving your son isn't stupid

    #3 68 days ago
    Quoted from SonOfaDiddly:

    loving your son isn't stupid

    Lot of dads never got that memo. Mine included.

    #4 68 days ago
    Quoted from zr11990:

    Today I am moving my son to Dallas to go to PT school. He got in on his first try I am crying like a bitch because my 22 year old should n is moving out. I will miss him so much

    When you love your kids its very difficult when the are ready to leave.When my daughter left it took months to get used to.

    #5 68 days ago

    Cry it out, bro!

    #6 68 days ago

    PT school? I would think at 22 he would be potty trained by now. :/

    #7 68 days ago

    Now is the time to pick up that guitar and let it all out!

    #8 68 days ago

    Your son is lucky to have a father that loves and cares for him so much. Good on you for being the parent that you are. Also, its ok to be sad he's moving out. Whether he's 2 or 22, he's your son and its understandable that you want him to be around.
    On a positive note, it looks like he will be about a 4 hour drive away. An 8 hour round trip is decent sized, but still doable in a day. Remind yourself that you'll still be able to go and see him, even if to just take him for lunch and catch up before turning back around to head home.
    Both you and him got this bud!

    15
    #9 68 days ago

    Dude I cry when my daughter writes a nice note about me....she's 8, and I cry when my son (6) says something sweet to his sister or mom. If you crying about your son moving out is stupid, then I'm the stupidest MF'r anyone will ever know.

    #10 68 days ago

    Congrats to your son and keep being dad.

    Also keep the Kleenex around just in case he sends you the bill.

    #11 68 days ago

    Not stupid at all. My kids are young and I get misty at the thought of them leaving.

    #12 68 days ago

    My son goes everywhere with me and we do everything together, he's my shadow. I dread the day he decides to move out. He's only 4 but still dont want to think about it

    #13 68 days ago

    Do not miss out on this opportunity to tell him how much you love him and how much you will miss him. So many times in my life I have been afraid of what would happen if I said things like this out loud to my family and just assumed they know. They have to know if I feel this so deeply - HAVE TO - right? Wrong. I am never disappointed when I actually say out loud how much love I feel for them in those moments. It's okay to be vulnerable.

    #14 68 days ago
    Quoted from ODENONMYSIDE513:

    My son goes everywhere with me and we do everything together, he's my shadow. I dread the day he decides to move out. He's only 4 but still dont want to think about it

    Same here, with my 9 year old son. One of my biggest fears in life is that when my three kids are grown and moved away, that I will look back and feel I didn't give them as best a childhood as I could've. I usually always try to remind myself that regardless of what's happening with work, etc. I need to slow down my evenings and weekends and just have fun and enjoy my time with my family. Because in the blink of an eye they will be all grown up.

    Damn zr11990 , now your getting the rest of us Dads in here with the emotions lol. Maybe this can become the Dad club / support thread here on pinside lol.

    #15 68 days ago
    Quoted from ODENONMYSIDE513:

    My son goes everywhere with me and we do everything together, he's my shadow. I dread the day he decides to move out. He's only 4 but still dont want to think about it

    We were the same way. They grow up and leave way too soon.
    He finished A&M in 3 years and had to wait a year before he could het into PT school. Having a grown son move back in had its issues. There were times when we were ready for him to go but that didn’t last long. Now he is moving out again and he most likely won’t be moving back in. They leave and there is a huge hole left behind

    #16 68 days ago
    Quoted from zr11990:

    They leave and there is a huge hole left behind

    Time to fill it with a new pinball machine!!

    (oh ..you meant figuratively)

    #17 68 days ago

    I went to a Parent /Teacher meeting when my Son was in elementary school,His teacher said My Son started every sentence with My Father says.It felt pretty cool I must say.You have many memories to think about cherish them.

    #18 67 days ago

    Went through the same thing this year when my 17 year old went off to university. Takes months to "get over it". They grow and change so much when they are away from home but you will be very proud of the person they turn into when they return.

    #19 67 days ago
    Quoted from CaptainNeo:

    PT school? I would think at 22 he would be potty trained by now. :/

    So PT school is Physical Therapist school? Correct?

    #20 67 days ago

    Giving your children roots and wings. Isn't always easy.

    LTG : )

    #21 67 days ago
    Quoted from sixtyfourbits:

    Same here, with my 9 year old son. One of my biggest fears in life is that when my three kids are grown and moved away, that I will look back and feel I didn't give them as best a childhood as I could've. I usually always try to remind myself that regardless of what's happening with work, etc. I need to slow down my evenings and weekends and just have fun and enjoy my time with my family. Because in the blink of an eye they will be all grown up.
    Damn zr11990 , now your getting the rest of us Dads in here with the emotions lol. Maybe this can become the Dad club / support thread here on pinside lol.

    Time flies by so fast. You'll never know when that last time you'll do something for them is. simple things like giving them a bath, brushing their teeth, helping them put their pants on, feeding them, holding them while they're trying to ride their bike, holding hands when you cross the street...F*ck now I'm getting teary in here lol.

    #22 67 days ago

    .

    Quoted from snyper2099:

    So PT school is Physical Therapist school? Correct?

    Yes

    #23 67 days ago
    Quoted from ODENONMYSIDE513:

    My son goes everywhere with me and we do everything together, he's my shadow. I dread the day he decides to move out. He's only 4 but still dont want to think about it

    + 1

    #24 67 days ago

    Crap, my kid is only 12 (going on 25) and he and I are constantly at odds with his middle school attitude - and I know I'll be a big mess once he leaves for school in a few years. I guarantee you're not going to call me stupid to my face. It's normal, dude!

    #25 67 days ago

    That's why your wife, husband or significant other is SO important.
    Because after the children are gone, it's just you and them.
    As your Indiana Jones pinball machine will say, "please choose, but choose wisely"

    #26 67 days ago

    I would be more worried if you gave him $20 bucks and a bus ticket.

    #27 67 days ago

    Good luck to your son, it sounds like you have helped him start out well. Don't think of it as he's moving out, think of it as expanding your search radius for games. Now you have someone in Dallas that can go take a quick look at a deal.

    This looks like a good reason to go for quick visits: https://pinside.com/pinball/map/where-to-play/10116-bishop-cidercade-dallas-tx

    #28 67 days ago
    Quoted from zr11990:

    Today I am moving my son to Dallas to go to PT school. He got in on his first try I am crying like a bitch because my 22 year old should n is moving out. I will miss him so much

    I'd be crying if my kids chose to stay home, but I hear ya

    And congratz to you and your son!

    #29 67 days ago

    Remember this is all part of life. It is never easy but he needs to be on his own to grow and you have done your job getting him to this point in life.

    With that said I miss both of my boys and we are currently living with one of them. We bought a house together almost 15 years ago - we live in a separate In-Law-Area and my son and daughter in law have the main house. Even living under the same roof sometimes we can go a couple weeks without seeing him. This is somewhat intentional because we know how important "separation" is. I would never want to live in a house (as an adult) where I spent every hour of every day with my parents and I am smart enough my kids don't want that either. On the "flip side" it is nice knowing he is only about 50 feet away if we need him for something and he feels the same way about us living here.

    Be sure to take the time to visit him often! Don't let life get in the way of at least doing that.

    Best of luck to both you and your son.

    #30 67 days ago

    You need to look on the bright side, its a whole room you can fill with pinballs.

    #31 67 days ago

    I feel terrible leaving him in a one room apartment by himself in basically the hospital district of Dallas.

    #32 67 days ago

    At least he is bettering himself and becoming a contributing member of society. I see too many of my friends letting there 20 something kids stay home, not work, and leech off them with not a care.
    Its's obvious you are proud of him. Don't feel bad at all and be happy it's not rehab or jail.

    #33 67 days ago
    Quoted from freeplay3:

    At least he is bettering himself and becoming a contributing member of society. I see too many of my friends letting there 20 something kids stay home, not work, and leech off them with not a care.
    Its's obvious you are proud of him. Don't feel bad at all and be happy it's not rehab or jail.

    Yea I know. I am very proud of him. I have seen people whose life just stay home and sponge off their parents. That would suck. I’m happy for him. He worked hard to get where he is. Not many kids get into PT school their first try and he got into 3 and had to turn two down. I’m really being selfish because I will miss my buddy.

    #34 67 days ago

    The area where he will be living is filled with recent college grads. Cool restaurants, bars, music venues. He will be in 22yo heaven. It's hard to see them go but at least he doing something useful with his life. You should be proud.

    #35 67 days ago

    I am very proud.

    #36 67 days ago

    QUIT BEIN STUPID
    Yer a great Dad bub.

    #37 67 days ago

    Nothing stupid about it, you’ve done your part, and still will after this, be proud.

    Heck, I remember the first time our oldest called me dad, and introduced me to her friends as “dad”. She’s not biologically mine, but she is my first child, and will always be that with me.

    Hold your head up high, and let him grow, that’s what you raised him to do. Be at peace with it my friend.

    #38 67 days ago

    I hear you man. My kids went from grade school to adults in like a month. It’s like when we took training wheels off the bike and launched them down the sidewalk a few weeks ago….wobble wobble “you’ve got this kiddo!”.

    #39 67 days ago
    Quoted from zr11990:

    Today I am moving my son to Dallas to go to PT school. He got in on his first try I am crying like a bitch because my 22 year old should n is moving out. I will miss him so much

    My 25 yo son deploys to boot camp May 23rd. From there 6 years on and off Submarines and Carriers for nuclear training. I’m distraught and have never been more concerned but outward I’m trying to be stoic and supportive.

    #40 67 days ago

    You’re being stupid, now are you happy?
    P.S.
    I was heartbroken when my daughter got married and moved out three years ago.

    #41 66 days ago

    So when I leave today I’m going to say goodby I love you you got this and turn around and get in the car, no tears no you can come home lif you need to, nothing. Yes?

    #42 66 days ago

    Tell him he's going to be a huge success, and to send pics of the girlfriends. Don't say goodbye, say see you soon. With a smile.

    #43 66 days ago

    Yea it's all good he will come and see u soon over and over

    #44 65 days ago

    Ok. We left him. I said you got this I’m proud of you you I love you. I told him to go back into his apartment and not look back that I would see him when he came home to visit and I left. Aaand it hurts

    #45 65 days ago
    Quoted from zr11990:

    Ok. We left him. I said you got this I’m proud of you you I love you. I told him to go back into his apartment and not look back that I would see him when he came home to visit and I left. Aaand it hurts

    That's the best u can do right on and I bet he will for sure come and see u when he can ,my son does

    #46 65 days ago
    Quoted from zr11990:

    They leave and there is a huge hole left behind

    A huge hole of free time and budgetary room!

    I honestly don't know how I'll feel when mine move out, but with a 17 year old and a 13 year old.....man I am so excited that the older one is finally taking an interest in college. Both because I'd like to have my own life at some point that isn't chained to every whim of a child, but also because I honestly figured he'd just given up on school, which would be pretty tragic. I never went to college, and my life's been a brawl for survival against debt and time. I've been in a decent place for a few years now, but it would've been so much easier if I'd been able to hack college.....unfortunately my parents never really put me in a good position to do that (pulled me out of public school after 9th grade and put me in a real shit situation, plus I basically lived by myself 90% of the time after my parents divorced) and the realities of life came sooner than later with my dad kicking the bucket when I was 21.

    Be proud you didn't make those mistakes, and put him out on the right path, man. It's no minor accomplishment on your part. It's his turn to take the reins and decide what he wants to do with his life, and it sounds like he's making the right choices.

    #47 65 days ago

    He is going to PT school. If he makes it through he will be have a PHD in physical therapy. He will do fine unless the United States just goes total depreciation, and it may very well do that.

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