I was separated from my wife and on a first date with a hot chick. Went to a comedy club in Hollywood. I saw some lady comedian performing with seats available in the back or up front. Wasn't concerned she would ruin my night so we went up front. She ends her act and says, "You're in for a treat, my friend Dice Clay". Dice walks straight up to me and says, "How long you been f ing her"? I said, "A few months". He turns towards her and asks, "So, you gonna marry him"? We both respond, Woah, and I say "I'm already married". Dice LOVES this response and barely beat me up after that. At the end of his set he looks back over at me and says something to the effect of, How's the yuppie doing with his Corona over there? Ends his act and a waitress comes by with 2 Corona's and says Dice thought you two were funny. He could have destroyed me, and chose not to. The girl and I ended up having a great relationship. So I was married, single, and divorced in 1 show.

I hired a woman to write some mortgage processing and underwriting books for my school, as well as teach. This woman was so supremely talented, I negotiated a buyout of my partner for a fair profit, and she bought him out. And I started dating her. After the financial crises hit, our school was closed and she went back to work. She would be a national director at a big mortgage company, or a COO at a mid level size. My recurrent pancreatitis got worse to where I can't work. So the poor girl has been taking care of me for the last 10 years. She taught me that some women make a good living off their household allowances. I net more than a good processor watching football while the maid and gardener are doing a good job. We married 8 years ago after 10 years of being together. And bought a big house here with 3 generations in it so I can watch my granddaughter grow up.