Hole'up.. Imma gonna fire up my JPop-to-English translator here and see if we can figure out what he really meant:
"Although some may feel that if we are not posting then we are all sitting around driving our Beemers to Starbucks.
"I know that 'sitting around driving' doesn't seem to make any sense, but actually I've invented a new car seat that spins around while taking you to the nearest coffee shop. I can't go into more details until I've finished spending $20,000 filing a patent on it. So if you see me at Starbucks, know that I'm working on important technology."
"And By 'we' I mean, me and my ego. And my ego would never fit in a BMW and drink something so common as coffee. You guys have no idea about us."
Not so and I feel very slighted as I work harder than most everyone I know.
"I worked last night almost to eleven! That p.m.! Spinal Top isn't the only one that goes up to eleven. That's very hard!"
While people are at home watching football or sports today, I am in the studio (as every day) working on pinball in it’s totality. Something I love to do.
"I'm writing a screenplay called, 'Pinball In It's Totality'. It's the story of a brilliant pinball designer, who drops out of high school after flunking out of English, with a dream of creating the most-best pinball game that ever was rugged, but he is persecuted by common people who like football or sports. It's bad enough being persecuted by one group of people, but both football fans and sports fans are too much for the brilliant pinball designer and he has to go on a magical quest to protect his kingdom by making an arteous journey through a verocious forest of haters in order to acquire the mystic shield of asset protection. Along the way he befriends a group of rag-tag adventurers looking for their courage, heart and brains who help him. I can't tell you more until after its copywrited, but I am pre-selling tickets to the first show."
I know it takes a huge effort to do this all,
"When I say 'huge' I mean like it takes a solid three inches of effort. Most people only have about two inches of effort. I know. I've been around. I teach classes on this stuff. Three inches is like 50% more effort than most people."
as well as the fine support from my fans, and am up to the task.
"Today's task will be to take Zombie's artwork, draw a lightning bolt on it, and take it to 'Deck the Walls' in the mall and get it professionally-framed for the office. This is how I give back to my fans. You're welcome. You're very welcome. Yes, I will probably be selling limited editions of that, my artwork. Yes, you can pre-order it with a check. Sorry no Paypal."
Case and point, how do we fill in spare time. Eating crickets….no.
"Did you know that spare time is measured in cases and points, and not crickets? This is why I'm John Popadiuk, the most famous pinball designer of them all. I spend all my time making sure all cases are pointed so you don't have to. Other pinball designers might be 'eating crickets' with their spare time, but I am busy pointing cases and casing points so that Magic Girl will be the most amazing game you've ever seen. All our cases and points are CUSTOM MADE, just for YOU. Again.. you are welcome."
Well we fill it with more invention, design and new ideas.
"Screenplays, spinning BMW seats, pointed cases, cased pointers, professionally-framed artwork! I don't care if you're a football fan or a sports fan, we will blow you away with our inventions, design and new ideas! But, sorry, there will be no crickets. I don't do crickets."
More than is really possible.
"Yes, you heard right. I, John Papadiuk, routinely achieve the impossible. In fact this morning, I actually was up at the Crack Of Don. Are other designers up at that crack? I don't think so."
Pinball building takes oodles of time, a week seems like a day.
"I may have slipped up and revealed another one of my soon-to-be-patented inventions: the Magic time-brain-dilation-zidmatron, which can take a week, make it seem like a day, yet suggest that it feels like more than a day and somehow makes sense. Don't try to understand it. It's one of the many things that are not really possible that I can do."
I may not get to emails for a while as I average 125 each day or more.
"I apologize if I do not respond sooner. But I'm involved in some very important business discussions with my new Nigerian parts supplier, DR PEPPER OJ RUMSFELD OBAMA. I'd love to tell you more about the exciting new business venture Zidware is engaged in, but it's secret and I can't let any of my competitors find out."
We now have 6+ other makers of some type of custom pinball (I was the only one 2 years ago)
"Now that there are four other 'makers of custom pinball' this explains why my game is being delayed. I had to take some time away from building MG, RAZA and AIW to teach those other guys how to make pinball machines. It's what I do. I'm John Papadiuk. I give back to the community. You're welcome."
, and most of them are using the old WMS style of cabinet and cabinet fittings.
"Those idiots are relying on parts designs that have stood the test of time, are cheap, well made and easily available..."
We also talked about this back at the start, but decided to spend the time and money creating our own look, brand, design and cabinet features. I am very pleased.
"We on the other hand, have decided to 're-invent-the-meal' and are brewing our own entirely new, much more expensive, unproven cabinet design that will take much longer to produce assuming we can find someone to produce it. I will then spend another $20,000 to patent this custom design in order to please myself. I like pleasing myself. I am very pleased."
At this time we are having the pinball cartons designed and some samples being made.
"Once I have a sample pinball carton designed, I will stand before it and bask it the glory of its designer, pull out a lamp I bought at Goodwill, and ask the magic genie inside to reproduce those cartons and fill them with the most amazing pinball machine you've ever seen. For I am John Papadiuk, doer of things that are more than possible!"
A pro box for a pro game. Again something not hugely riveting but still 2 companies with a small design team to accomplish this.
"It takes two companies with a small design team to produce a cardboard box. So don't you criticize me. Have you ever made a 'Pro Box(tm)' Check-mate. I rest your case!"
Similar for some other items and things we are doing, the future of pinball. Our future as a hobby.
"I appreciate your faith in me and my ability to represent the future of pinball. As you can see, there's every chance I will let you down, but that's likely to happen because I am John Papadiuk, I work to eleven, get up at the Crack of Don, and I just got a new rug for my office! The future of pinball is safe and in my hands."
Obviously patents need to be protected, and we felt with our new light system it was worth the time and effort.
"One of my biggest fans is my patent attorney. If you all could see what he sees, you'd understand why I do what I do. It's worth it. He gets me. He understands why this technology is important and he spends a lot of time and effort too."
Especially for the coming years ahead and some of the game themes we want to do or people we want to partner with.
"Ok, I'm sorry. I have no freakin' idea what I am talking about. For a moment there I drifted off and was thinking about cream corn. Why is it so tasty? Why has there not been a 'Creamed Corn'-themed pinball machine? Oh wow. I smell pre-order #4 cooking! Oh wait, where was I? "
In this case there are dozens more “secrets” behind the scenes we keep quiet, and some really big negotiations in the works and off the blog for good reasons.
"You can see why it's important to keep these things secret. I've already said too much and given away too much of our great, unique ideas: cardboard box to put the game in, different leg bolts that cost five times more than regular ones, our Nigerian government partner, and an industry-first cricket-free pinball game! I've said too much. This e-mail will self-destruct in both 5 or 211,783 seconds."
All of this is important to what we are doing and reflected in the game design ultimately. It’s just not about a playfield.
"Playfields are soooo overrated. I invite you to marvel at the design of our 'Pro Box(tm)'. Yea, we did that. Who else has a Pro Box(tm)? Custom made cardboard. Sample. Going to be many more. You're welcome."
So for me the quiet time, which is no blogging, is full of work, invention and design. We never stop creating and the Mac computers we use are but a tool and not the source of our genius. Chirp…Jpop"
"I like the quiet time. That's when my wife goes to sleep and I get to watch Nick at Night. It's the source of our genius: Pro Boxes, time-brain-dilation-zidmatron, spinning seats, creamed corn, zombies, jesus, alice in wonderland, crickets.. HA! Fooled you. Still no crickets! Case And Point. You're welcome."