Some people just don't want to play competitive pinball. I could always see the light at the end of the tunnel, but many folks don't enjoy getting stomped by top players. I actually grew to like playing the best around because i could see what they were doing around the flippers, going for strategy wise, rack their brains etc. I'm not really helping here I know, but realizing the two groups are separate and have different interests is key IMO

Everyone loves losing to me and beating me I'm sure. It's supposed to be fun and I try to remember that everytime I play. That said I really, really hate losing so I MUST TRY HARD. Of course that's not to be confused with being friendly and offering advice/suggestions or answering questions of other players- which is obviously helpful to growing the community.

people offer lessons/cold cuts/shasta on Craigslist from time to time. Keep your eyes open.