(Topic ID: 310773)
Newmarket, ON
1 week later
Cedar Grove, NC
I’ve never had a Chinese Pork Bun, but the pizza recipe was posted on the internet so it HAD to be good, right?
The sauce was a mixture of Italian, Mexican, American, and Chinese. It starts with Hunts Garlic and Herb Pasta Sauce.
Then Sweet Baby Ray’s BBQ Sauce, Hoisin Sauce, Oyster Sauce, Rice Vinegar, Sesame Oil, and Barley Malt Syrup.
I do not think that the Chinese can even PRONOUNCE “Barley Malt Syrup”, so what is it doing in there?
Then I dumped in something called Chinese Five Spice powder, and then Liquid Smoke. How could that not be good?
DSC_0600 (resized).JPGThe sauce is mixed, and the recipe said I could use Chicken instead of Pork, but I still have to call it a Pork Bun Pizza.
I guess it is like the way Pierogi might have potatoes or cheese or prunes. I am getting suspicious about what seems like a huge amount of ingredients. This was supposed to make ONE pizza.
And the third topping here is shredded Cabbage…
DSC_0611 (resized).JPGHow about covering it with Walmart Fiesta Blend Cheese?
That’s what the recipe specifically calls for. Fiesta is Monterey Jack, Mexican Queso Quesadillo, and Asadero Cheese.
What the HELL is Asadero Cheese? Donkey Milk? I thought it was Asiago until looked at the picture as I typed this.
Google says it is Mexican Nacho Cheese. Is this REALLY an Authentic Chinese Ingredient?
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1 week later
In America, they are called Golumpki. I tried to google Gowumpki, but it insisted that it is spelled Golumpki.
In Poland, it is spelled gołąbki. But is PRONOUNCED “Gowumpki”. It means Pigeon, because um, it just does.
But even in Poland, Golumpkies are not made out of pigeons.
The Polish word Gowumpki is plural because a typical serving consists of several Golumpki. If you have only one, you have a Go-WUMP.
In Czech and Slovak, Holubki is the plural. If you have only one, it is a holub.
In Russia they are called Golubtsy. In the Ukraine they are Holubtsi.
Real Polish people point out that no one would EVER say Go-WUMP.
They would call just one a Golabek. But they PRONOUNCE it “go-woom-bek”.
Golumpkies have been around a long time. Back in Ancient Rus, which was Ukraine, western Russia, Slovakia, and eastern Poland, Golumpkis were considered traditional. So they were probably making Golumpki for centuries before that.
Ancient Rus split into the Greek Orthodox Muscovy (Moscow), and the Catholic Poland/Slovakia/Lithuania in a war led by Casimir IV Jagiello.
They were badly outnumbered, but the Polish story is that Casimir fed his army with gołąbki before a key battle of the Thirteen Years' War, and his victory stemmed from the strength of the hearty meal. Casimir IV Jagiello became Grand Duke of Lithuania and King of Poland. Because of Golumpki.
Casimir should have been the patron saint of Golumpki. Instead, he became Saint Casimir, Patron Saint of Poland.
And Patron Saint of Lithuania. And Patron Saint of the Young. So I guess he was happy with that.
Slovakia already had three Patron saints for 600 years before Ancient Rus split up. The first was The Virgin Mary.
The others were two Byzantine Greek brothers named Saint Cyril and Saint Methodius .
They invented the Cyrillic alphabet, which is the oldest known Slavic alphabet, in order to translate the Bible into the Slavic languages. In 1980, Pope John Paul II declared them Patron Saints of Europe, together with Benedict of Nursia.
Poland is densely forested, so they use a lot of mushrooms, forest fruits, and nuts. And they have a lot of cows and pigs.
And Pigeons. And long cold seasons where the main thing that grows really well is cabbage.
So Stuffed Cabbage Golumpki is just logical. In 1518 the Queen of Poland brought over hundreds of chefs from Italy and France. Because she was really into cooking. These chefs introduced leeks, carrots, lettuce and celery and other vegi’s.
Even today, vegetables like leeks, carrots and celery are known in Polish as włoszczyzna, which refers to Włochy, the Polish name of Italy.
The first Polish cook-book was by Lucyna Ćwierczakiewiczowa. Say THAT three times fast!
What is surprising is that Poland has the worlds lowest percentage of overweight people. And Europe’s highest proportion of high school graduates, over 90% of Poles graduated high school. America only has 75% high school grads.
Poles have won a total of 17 Nobel prizes. The biochemist Casimir Funk got one for first isolating and formulating the concept of "vitamins". He also named them “Vitamins”. Too bad he was humble, because we could have been taking our daily Funkamins.
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