First of all, thanks for bringing this up. It's good to get some feedback. It's difficult to put a price on "digital services" (and that's essentially what I'm selling) but let me preface by saying this: realistically, I cannot run Pinside for free.
With that said, I would first like to summarize Pinside's current fees (our ways of generating income).
The red heart is given to those who make a voluntary donation to Pinside, who contribute to the costs of running this site. Donations were much needed when Pinside was still my hobby project (heck, when I started Pinside I was still in school) but they're still needed today as the site keeps growing, without any main sponsorship or third party advertising.
The voluntary sales fee that people can choose to pay for successful wanted ads a parts ads in the Pinside Market should absolutely count towards the red heart status. It's voluntary after all. The only reason it doesn't is a technical limitation. The donation system was built way back, in 2010. The Marketplace sales fee more recently (like 1,5 years ago). They are separate systems and I still need to link them together. Almost no one ever asked about this so it was not a high priority, but I'll move it up on the list!
We also have a mandatory marketplace sales fee, which is not a donation. It's a fee you agree to pay when selling your game through the Pinside Marketplace. The fee ranges from $2.50 to $35.00 (based on the value of the game you're selling). Listing on Pinside is free. You can post dozens of pictures with your ad, free. You get thousands of eyeballs on it. All free. But when you successfully sell your game, you pay the sales fee. This is not connected to (does not count towards) donations or the red heart (remember, the heart is a voluntary contribution, while the sales fee is payment for a service). Although red hearts do get a nice 25% discount on that sales fee as an added benefit for those supporting the site voluntarily.
Pinside+ offers power features that we can not provide to everyone for free. Currently priced at $2.90 per month ($35/yr) it allows you to send unlimited PMs, attach images in PM threads, get instant Marketplace notifications when (wishlist) games are added our Marketplace (be the first to see new ads!) and there's another amazing new feature for plus members coming this summer. The philosophy behind plus is that people pay for features that do not benefit the community as a whole, they are really personal enhancements for your own benefit. For example, with PM attachments. I wanted to do these for a long time, but there is no way I could offer this option for free to the thousands of active users of our PM system - it would be too expensive.
Shops are aimed mostly at small mod makers who don't have a website and/or web shop in place and want to offer their products to the community in a way that feels trustworthy (as opposed to a random Paypal link in a thread somewhere). Shops are free to set up and we provide free hosting and a complete ordering system. If shops sell something, a fixed 5% fee goes to Pinside. I think this is extremely reasonable. The promo box at the bottom of threads, displaying shops items, is a way to get word out about cool mods and add-ons. I consider the aftermarket a great part of the whole pinball hobby. Where would this hobby be without parts and add-ons?
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So that's essentially where we generate our main income from. Now I realize that for the Pinsiders who use the site extensively, all of this can feel a bit much. Like we're nickel and diming them around every corner. This is not my intention! I simply believe that someone who sells 20 games through Pinside should pay more than someone who uses the forums and PM system occasionally. Ultimately, we wanted to try to come up with a fees structure that's fair to everyone, but this is not easy.
There are alternatives. Instead of the end users paying for the site's existence, we could try to get pinball companies to foot (some of) the bill. I've been getting a lot of request from companies who just want to advertise their products on Pinside. Banners or whatnot. Maybe Pinside should just start showing advertising from pinball related companies and see how that goes? It seems like every other website is paying the bills that way
Anyways... There's a bunch of cool features coming (hopefully) this summer. While I'm working on that, I will also be thinking about whether there's a way to revisit/restructure our fees. I hear your message and there are some valid points.