(Topic ID: 69605)

For fun: Worst possible themes for a pinball machine

By Zappa

5 years ago

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  • 216 posts
  • 115 Pinsiders participating
  • Latest reply 5 years ago by Breadfan
  • Topic is favorited by 2 Pinsiders


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    There are 216 posts in this topic. You are on page 1 of 5.
    #1 5 years ago

    OK, imagine a bizzaro world where the worst possible, ill-advised ideas were made into machines. We all know that TV Shows and Movies make for great pinball. What are some bad ideas? I have a few, please feel free to add, the more obscure and bizarre the better:

    Family Affair: Jody! Buffy! Cissy! The stern but lovable Mr. French, and the mumbling bipolar uncle who hates his life. Endless adventures await, help Jody beat a bully, find Buffy's doll, restrain Cissy's lesbian urges, keep the father from committing suicide.

    Mr. T: I pity the fool who don't play my game! Get Nancy Reagan to kiss you, collect chains, threaten people to call you MISTER T!

    Punky Brewster: Insert increasing breast size joke here:

    The Ropers: You loved them on Three's Company, but we couldn't license that game, but we got the spinoff. Help Stanley collect the rent! Helen double- entendre' sex jokes increase multiplyer. The big challenge is to get Mr. Roper to satisfy his lusty wife.

    Honey Boo-Boo: increase Honey's sugar content so she can win the pageant, collect tacky dresses, slutty makeup and increase Honey's talent for the talent show.

    The Big Ragoo: We couldn't get a license for Laverne, or Shirley, or Lenny & Squiggy (how great would that be?), so we got Eddie Mekka to reprise "The Big Ragoo". Try to get Shirley to third base, try to get a singing gig. Attempt to revive a career...

    The Family Circus: We love comics turned into machines..because we all love the Bugs Bunny machine, and the Flintstones, uh..and Space Jam? Make Jeffy take a roundabout walk home, blame mistakes on "Not me" and "Ida Know", make Dolly say funny mispronounced words, Get Thel to the pharmacy to get anti depressants. Machine will be circular and everything will be grossly disproportionate.

    Small Wonder: Vickie is a robot! It writes itself

    Helen Crump: Andy Taylor's girlfriend, grade papers, get jealous at Andy, multiplier as you sleep with Goober, then Gomer, then Otis and top it off with Howard Sprague. Ron Howard, not included.

    USFL Football Madness!: guide your way through the exciting USFL football league and win the USFL Championship, choose your team, are you an Arizona Wrangler? a Memphis Showboat? Or an Oklahoma Outlaw? Losing teams go bankrupt, sue the NFL on Anti-Trust violations and avoid having Donald Trump kill the league.

    The Love Boat: goals are: Issac Your Bartender: serve enough drinks to make Nancy Walker and Milton Berle drunk, Gopher: fend off romantic advances from Martha Raye, Mackenzie Phillips and Ted Knight., Doc: can you keep Carole Channing and Phylils Diller from spreading VD on the ship, hurry, they got Abe Vigoda and Henry Morgan! Julie McCoy: score as much coke as you can from special guest star Andy Gibb and try to hide your habit from the crew. Captain Stubing: fend off the romantic advances of Charles Nelson Reilly and Paul Lynde on the gay cruise, and try to find someone to pilot the ship during a hurricane as you sit at the Captain's table with Brett Somers and Jimmy Baio, Vickie...eww, just ewww (try to get her dumped overboard late at night). Charo: get Jamie Farr and Gary Burghoff to teach you how to speak English, win a special solo guitar bonus when you get enough "cucchi cucchi" points.

    You get the idea, pitch me the worst ideas for pinball that live somewhere in your twisted psyche, nothing is sacred, shameless mockery, excessive snarky-ness and and blatant thumbs down votes encouraged.

    #2 5 years ago

    My Mother The Car.

    LTG : )

    #3 5 years ago
    Quoted from LTG:

    My Mother The Car.
    LTG : )

    Since you took mine Lloyd I will have to go with Trans Vaginal Mesh.

    #5 5 years ago

    Cougar Town
    The Bachelor
    That's So Raven
    Basketball Wives
    16 & Pregnant

    LTG : )

    #6 5 years ago

    Washington DC, the pinball game.

    #7 5 years ago

    16 & Pregnant!!! LOL

    #9 5 years ago

    Herpes: STD #1.

    #10 5 years ago

    Buran: (the Soviet Space Shuttle)

    #11 5 years ago

    Fashion Show.

    ...oh wait, it's been done.

    Fashion Show.jpg
    #13 5 years ago


    #14 5 years ago

    Pinside, the machine.

    #15 5 years ago

    "Ceaucescau, guardian of freedom"

    #16 5 years ago

    John Wayne Gacy's Clown Circus (with a cellar playing field, like Haunted House)

    #18 5 years ago

    ok has to be done,,, Divorce Court,,, make all the ramps and mode, and the b*tch comes and takes half your points away, and steals your balls. LOL

    #19 5 years ago

    Some music ideas:

    Kenny G! (tagline: Make him blow!)

    Branson, where the singers you thought were dead still perform.

    Frankie Goes to Hollywood!

    Sun Ra (wayyyyy over the head of almost everyone, but damn, it sure would look cool)

    #21 5 years ago

    The real world.

    #22 5 years ago

    NFL 1998: Ryan Leaf LE

    #23 5 years ago

    Pretty much anything MTV airs would be a horrible theme.

    #24 5 years ago
    Quoted from Zappa:

    John Wayne Gacy's Clown Circus (with a cellar playing field, like Haunted House)

    It was already done before...

    #25 5 years ago

    That table scares me.....

    How about "Marilyn Manson's Tea Party"

    #26 5 years ago

    Going to the Mall. Shopping.

    #27 5 years ago

    The Department of Motor Vehicles
    Sex and the City
    Tax Audit
    Keeping up with the Khardashians
    Honey Boo Boo
    It's the day of a big test at school, and you haven't been to class all semester... and you're naked: the pinball machine
    Dreaming that you're taking a piss while you're really just pissing the bed: the pinball machine
    Accidentally farting in a job interview, and then the interviewer tells you that her father was killed by poisonous gas: the pinball machine
    She's got daddy issues: the pinball machine

    #28 5 years ago

    I'm thinking of an old EM machine with appropriate art "Jail Bait"



    #29 5 years ago
    Quoted from 30FathomDave:

    She's got daddy issues: the pinball machine


    #30 5 years ago

    Ex wife pin
    Abba / Mama Mia
    Donnie & Marie
    Love Boat
    Chucky vs the Care Bears
    To catch a predator

    #31 5 years ago

    Fuck the pain away

    #32 5 years ago


    A few more:
    Does this make me look fat?
    Surprise visit from the in-laws
    Premature ejaculation (and its sequel: Why the f*** can't I finish tonight?)
    You check your blood sugar, and you check it often: The Pinball Machine (also known as Wilford Brimley's Di-a-bee-tus Adventureland)

    #33 5 years ago
    Quoted from BagAJellyDonuts:

    Washington DC, the pinball game.

    Well, if your score is the national debt, then at least there would be a reason to score well into the trillions.

    #34 5 years ago

    There are no new subjects, I guess.


    These were my contributions:

    Rush Limbaugh
    Sewage Treatment Plant
    Swine Flu
    The Many Faces of Alec Baldwin
    Orphanage Arsonist
    Smegma Patrol
    Fox News
    Obesity Epidemic
    Dingo vs Baby

    #35 5 years ago

    The first thing that came to mind when I saw this thread title:

    "Springtime, for Hitler, in Germany!"

    #36 5 years ago

    David Carradine: Auto Erotica

    Dead Animal Pickup

    #37 5 years ago

    Costco the pinball machine!

    "Filing your Taxes!" and it's sequel "Surprise! You've been Audited"

    Pualie Shore
    Andy Dick
    Full House
    Family Matters
    The Bible
    M. Night Shyamalan
    American Idol / X Factor / The Voice
    Real Housewives
    Stuck In Traffic
    Kidney Stones
    Kicked in the Nuts

    #38 5 years ago

    Obamacare - The Pinball

    And this one's for you my friend!!

    #39 5 years ago

    There's Something About Miriam - The Game With Balls.

    The Wiggles

    Miley Cyrus

    The Price Is Right


    #40 5 years ago

    The worst themes I can imagine on pinball might be Elvis and the Addams family.

    #41 5 years ago


    #42 5 years ago

    Nancy Grace

    #44 5 years ago

    Junk puncher - unlicensed theme but NOT a table you'd want to tilt. There's also it's "subtract-a-ball" version Junk-kicker.

    #45 5 years ago

    C-Span: Live from the Senate Floor!

    #46 5 years ago


    #47 5 years ago
    Quoted from markmon:

    The worst themes I can imagine on pinball might be Elvis and the Addams Family.

    Wow! I can think of many many current titles that come before those two.

    #48 5 years ago

    A Klaus Nomi pin..LOL

    #49 5 years ago

    I actually bought a Klaus Nomi CD recently

    Potatoes would make a bad theme I think... or any root vegetable...

    #50 5 years ago

    Cop Rock
    Middle School

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