The real concern for the OP, is the son’s future. Barely making it today means a real struggle at 60.
I run a small company and have been doing the grind for 34 years. I’ve seen guys that started at the business making 40k and gave their left nut and now make 250-300k. Most people don’t make it long enough or want to sacrifice enough to get there. It’s called work for a reason, but financial pressures in the future due to lack of work ethics when you’re younger can be dismal.
The future problem will be that your son and daughter that didn’t do the grind now will be the parents problem in the future.
I’m a parent of a 16 year old daughter and have her working now to prepare her for financial independence down the road. I don’t want that to be my responsibility in the future.
I’m sure people will not like this statement, but work ethics have changed and people aren’t the same as they once were. I work with 60-80 year olds that I would take over a 20-30 year old all day! Sad but true.