Dialed In's have not been available to play enough to really make a good decision between the two. Some people are picking DI based on "newer tech", and others are disregarding it. But playing a game for 30 minutes at a show really is not enough time to make a good call IMO.

Spider-Man plays nothing like AFM. They are both fan layouts and have the same retracting target bank in the center, but that's where the similarity ends. Spider-Man is laid out much more like Star Trek - which has a layout that is the same as STTNG, but not wide body.

It take a lot to "Rule the Universe" on AFM - it's something that 95% of players will only achieve maybe once a year playing frequently.
Why would anyone want a game that is NOT beatable? I would much rather have the RTU rules on AFM than the Do or Die Multiball on Iron Man (which is much more un-beatable). Where is the value in having a wizard mode that you can never get to it? Or that you only got to it once in 10 years (assuming you have a decent skill level).